Age | 25 | |
Height | 172 | |
Eye Color | Grey | |
Hair Color | Ultra long | |
Bust | 38 | |
Cup | C | |
Seeking | Look Real Swingers | |
Relation Type | Horny Lonely Girls Search Dating Married Men |
My collection became a shrine of sorts, but nothing too sinister I hope. I have stuck with her through the disastrous boyfriends, the broken marriage, the iffy movies wkman TV shows, the scandals, and even the token agrarianism. But it is in North America that the Nauhty of spanking is at its loudest. I just found her unbelievably beautiful and sexy. I am proud to say I have always returned to Hurley.
But why?
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At first I refused, but the whole room began booing and hissing. You look as hot at 50 as you ever did. Within a few months, she firmly became my favourite pin-up. I leant over Nakghty reach for the olive oil and felt a sharp slap on my backside. She also looked fun and definitely the right side of very naughty.
Spanking is now big business: scores of firms in Britain sell mail-order "light corrective" equipment. One day I was dressing a salad in the kitchen. While some men sensibly disown their fantasy crushes at the altar, my poor wife has had to endure the presence of Ms Hurley in our marriage for the past 14 years. And, of course, this bash would be incomplete without an obligatory round of the Spanking Game.
Oh, the cheek of it!
In Chicago, therefore, you can buy equipment at the House of Thwacks; and in Vancouver, you can stay at the picturesque Payne Manor. Friends would come into my room and notice the picture.
Oh, the cheek of it! These days, womman, spanking is spread across a much wider social spectrum than just apes and aristocrats. Of an evening, when they're all premiered out, the Viles apparently go round to each other's houses and take turns to bend over a sofa, baring their glutei maximi to the others.
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The object of the game is for the spankee to guess the identity of the spanker. So institutionalised is rump-whacking that, rather like hairdressing salons in Britain, the businesses all have jokey names. Hurley and friends aside, the s are that spanking is now making its mark on mainstream UK society.
So discerning have Britain's bottom-smackers become that there is now even a sort of Which? And so, it seems, do thousands of others. You can also buy any of glossy magazines on the subject, one of which, Skin Two, claims 30, readers per issue. Emma and Michael are city lawyers who met at a client's drinks party last year. I maintain, like Joan Collins, she encapsulates the qualities that British men and some Australian cricketers of a certain kind find utterly irresistible.
Then there is the shameful fact of my Twitter.
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According to Los Angeles, a Hollywood-based magazine, Hurley belongs to a group of racy English expats nicknamed the Viles, for whom spanking beats the pants off other party games. While many fans have come and gone since the early Hurley of the s, I have remained ferociously loyal More pictures were swiftly found, and poor old Noor took the chop in favour of Elizabeth, not least because I had run out of Blu-Tack. Certainly, she was a good foil to the overly-polished starlets who were on the scene back then.
Hurlej news that Elizabeth Hurley is partial to a bit of spanking has sent a warm glow of excitement across the cheeks of her admirers. This must have been around - a long time ago. Who was the first person I followed? Now that smacks of success.
What is it that makes Elizabeth Hurley so appealing not just to myself, but to so many other British men? My unrequited passion does make life somewhat complicated, for I am a married man.
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You can imagine the fun they have. And when she once replied to one of my tweets, that was almost the best moment of my life.
According to the anthropologist and author Ted Polhemus, the pleasure Hugley can be derived from a spanking session is available to all. I decided it was easier just to get on with it.
That was when he first admitted he was into spanking. Overarching sexual optimism is surely another hallmark of masculine adolescence and Elizabeth seemed within range, obtainable somehow.
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While many fans have come and gone since the early Hurley of the s, I have remained ferociously loyal. Immediately captivated, out came the scissors and up she went on my wall, along with Suzanne Mizzi, Patsy Kensit, Catherine Oxenberg, and, of all people, Queen Noor of Jordan.
I may have occasionally strayed into the fantasy arms of Kate Beckinsale and Eva Green, but no-one has tempted me away from her thrall for good. Trinny Woodhall, Liz Hurley and Amanda Wakely, but there's only one woman for Guy Picture: Rex But there have been Nwughty bad moments, not least when Annabel found my magazine collection several years ago when she was moving into my flat.
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I have thought about this long Hurlfy hard. So Happy Birthday Elizabeth. So when I bumped into Annabel, the Hurleyesque woman who would be my wife at the Henley Regatta, the attraction was immediate.